top of the rollercoaster

All that work - and it's almost over already! Just got to pack up the pressies from under the tree and join the family for Christmas lunch at mum's.

the first week of eating dangerously

Day 7 of my new un-diet, featuring the return of... gluten!

Well, after early stomach uneasiness following my pizza and pasta meals, I decided to try something a little less gluten-intense for the next treat.

During a visit to Prahran market on Saturday morning, I stopped at a bakery where the lady sells almond croissants (but only on Saturdays!) Too good to pass up! I bought just one, and packed it in my bag for later.

At the supermarket, I picked up a loaf of spelt bread. Spelt is an ancient grain which can be tolerated by some coeliacs, though I had never tried it before. I thought it might be a good way to try something a little easier to digest than 'normal' wheat bread.

When I got home from the market, I made a cup of (gluten-free) soup for lunch, and then attacked the croissant for dessert! OMG It was fantastic! The butter pastry melted in my mouth; the almond flavour was rich and sensuous; the icing sugar coated my face! Once again, a gluten-filled treat had whisked me off to food-heaven! But it was filling. I could only manage about half; the rest, I packed away for later.

No apparent after-effects from this treat.

That evening, after a gluten-free dinner, I buttered a slice of spelt bread and smothered it in a light coating of Vegemite. The bread was soft to the touch, so unlike gluten-free bread, and just like real bread! I ate it slowly, savouring each mouthful. When I was done, I buttered another slice, and spread it with strawberry jam. Bewdi-ful!

That night, I once again felt some stomach discomfort, but nothing too serious.

On Sunday, I had spelt bread sandwiches for lunch - buttered, with fresh slices of corned beef from the deli. That night, I made two rounds of sandwiches for my lunch the next day, and packed them in the fridge for the night. So much easier and quicker and cheaper than the gluten-free lunches I used to have to make!

I had sandwiches again for lunch Monday and Tuesday, and finished the loaf today. I made people watch me eat them, just to prove that I, too, could eat 'normal' lunches :-)

Since I was late getting home tonight, after stopping to see a movie, I bought fish and chips en route home. Usually, I throw away the complementary potato cakes and peel the batter from the fish before I eat it. Old habits die hard. I couldn't bring myself to eat the potato cakes, and I still peeled off most of the batter from the fish, but I did a eat a few mouthfuls of it.

Maybe that was a few too much... tonight, I have more severe stomach pains and a touch of the runs. Perhaps I'll try a gluten-free day tomorrow, and give my insides more chance to adapt.

broken arms??

It's been almost six weeks since I last managed to find a movie that interested me enough to get me out to the cinema, and by last night, I was getting desperate.

A quick scan of yourmovies.com.au revealed an appalling shortage of appealling films - except for two! One was a Spanish movie whose title had me intrigued but a bit trepidatious - Los Abrazos Rotos - which, in my little-used Spanish, translated as 'Broken arms'; the other was a preview session of Nowhere Boy, starring the irresistable Kristen Scott-Thomas, but showing only at the Brighton Bay (in preview).

Anyway, to cut a long story short, I opted for Kristen, raced around like a chook without a head to get ready in time to catch the 7:15 session, and drove down to Brighton, arriving at the ticket counter at 7:13 precisely! Everything had worked out beautifully - light traffic, good car park, there wasn't even a queue for tickets! - until I ordered my ticket... and was told that the movie isn't showing until Boxing Day!! Yes, apparently, *sometimes*, the online movie listings aren't correctly updated, and in fact, even though the Brighton Bay was reported to be showing three sessions per day of Nowhere Boy all week, it was in fact Nowhere to be found until Friday!

Not only did I waste a trip to Brighton, but I was now too late to get to another cinema in time to see Los Abrazos Rotos (which I had by now realised actually meant 'Broken embraces' - 'Abrazos', not 'Brazos' (arms)!

So today, determined to see a some film somewhere, I went straight from work to the Kino to see Broken Embraces.

It was great to get back to the cinema again! The movie wasn't bad. It was the first Pedro Almodovar film I've seen. The story was interesting, but it was a bit long... could have done with tighter editing, and perhaps 10 minutes or so cut. Penelope Cruz was great, though, and the story climax was pretty good, though the actual ending of the movie was a bit lame. I'd give it *** out of 5.

christmas mail

I love lots of things about Christmas. But there are some things that I don't love about Christmas, and as the Christmas season approaches its climax, now is the time to get them off my chest.

Writing Christmas cards. I detest writing Christmas cards. In fact, I don't like doing any sort of writing with a pen and paper any more, but of all written things, Christmas cards are the worst. Even worse than birthday cards, because birthdays are generally spread out across the year, and don't need to be written all at once.

Last year, I decided to take the bull by the horns, and do the cards early. Late November 2008, I bought a couple of boxes of cards, a couple of dozen of those kitsch Christmas stamps, and sat down for two or three evenings to write (yes, it takes me that long to think of different ways to say 'Merry Christmas and Happy New Year' on a card).

First week of December, I posted out 32 cards. And not a minute too soon, as I received my first one back in that very day's post, from someone even more organised than I was (or perhaps, someone who hated writing cards as much as I do!)

But... by last mail on Christmas Eve, a quick census of my mantelpiece confirmed my growing suspicion throughout that month - exactly one half of the people that I had carefully and dutifully crafted Christmas cards for had returned the favour! 16 cards, plus another 2 from people I'd left off my original list (another thing I hate about Christmas mail - unexpected last-minute Christmas cards, when it's too late to send a reply and pretend that you hadn't always planned to do so!)

Somewhere along the line, half of the people that I had carded had decided that Christmas cards were 'out' in 2008, and they didn't bother to even reply when they received one.

For a time, I was outraged and insulted.

Then I thought it over. And it made sense. These cards cost time and money and effort. They sit on the mantelpiece for a week or two, then they get thrown into the recycle bin. All that effort for just that.

Clearly, sending Christmas cards was just too 19th century. It was time I got with it.

So in 2009, I wrote no Christmas cards in advance. This year, I sat back and waited to see what the mailman would bring, if I didn't initiate the transaction. And to no surprise, the mail delivery fell off even further than last year. With four delivery days left until C Day (at most, depending on union action), I have received only 5 cards, all of which I have dutifully replied to.

So that's my official Christmas card policy from now on. No more bulk card writing and posting, just polite replies to those who still have an interest in sending and receiving cards. Much less stressful. It's beginning to feel a lot like Christmas already.

second course

Well, that pizza, fantastic as it was, didn't exactly open the gluten floodgates for me, but it gave me some inspiration to go on.

It took about 24 hours for my stomach to settle again, so by the next evening, I was ready to try another dish on my list. I went out for dinner at EcoBlue in Orrong Rd, and chose a simple penne napolitana. It was delicious. The sauce was a light tomato and basil delight, but the pasta! Real pasta, cooked perfectly, and made from real wheat, instead of rice! It looked right; it tasted superb.

An hour later, my stomach started complaining again, but of course, it was going to take some time to adjust.

first dose!

Well, even though I've had the go-ahead to eat gluten again for several days, it's been tough, tough, tough to make a start.

Sure I've missed the odd delicacy - like warm, crusty bread, smothered in melting butter and dripping with honey or marmalade; hot, spicy pizza; a sweet, buttery croissant; the flaky pastry on a freshly-heated cornish pastie - to name but a few, but after several years of training myself not to think about those things, nor dare to put them near my mouth, it was surprisingly tough to just pick something up and eat it.

Finally, though, I had to just get over it and do it. So today, I bought a pizza for my lunch. Not just any pizza, but a hot salami and pineapple pizza from one of my favourite pizzerias from 'the old days', in the Paramount Centre off Bourke St.

To eat this pizza... was an almost indescribable experience!

The crust was thick and chewy, perfectly baked; the topping was spicy, but with the sweetness of the pineapple, and a buttery after-taste that made it feel as though it was melting in my mouth.

Every mouthful was heaven!

And when I finished it... I felt fine. For about an hour.

Then I developed mild abdominal pains for most of the afternoon. I guess this could just be my system adjusting to this new / old eating sensation. I hope so, anyway. This experience is way too good to have to forgo again!

the killer argument

I'd say I'm a pretty rational type; I tend to believe in things I can see or experience or realistically imagine, and dismiss the rest (such as religion ). But when I experience something that rational solutions don't seem to recognise or apply to, I'm willing to expand my horizons and broaden my beliefs. Which is how I originally became interested in naturopathic / homeopathic therapies.

After many years suffering from various complaints which were apparently unrelated, undiagnosable and untreatable (by regular medicine), I took a side-track to a naturopath ... whose apparently illogical and un-rationalisable treatments did make a difference.

Over the years, I saw a number of naturopaths, and eventually found Gordon, whom I consider to be the world's greatest naturopath!

Among the things that Gordon told me was that I was gluten-intolerant, and that by undergoing a detox program and avoiding foods containing gluten, many of the complaints that had dogged me for most of my adult life would improve or vanish.

I didn't want to believe Gordon, at first. After all, my staple diet then revolved around bread, pizza, cake, pastries, pies, biscuits, scones, pasta, cereal - I couldn't imagine life without those basic necessities and mouth-watering delicacies.

But I was desperate, so I agreed to give it a month or two, and see how it worked out.

It was tough! Suddenly, my staples were forbidden to me, and I had to learn to eat rice crackers and gluten-free muesli, rice, dry, crumbly gluten-free cake, rice, pallid, gluten-free pasta, rice, and oh, did I mention... rice?

Eating became a boring drudge, trying to find new ways to prepare rice and rice-based meals, and avoiding things like soy sauce and other condiments, which invariably contained the dreaded gluten.

But I didn't have to wait long to realise it was the right thing to do. Within a few weeks, I could feel the difference, and I knew I was doing the right thing, no matter how distasteful it was. Gluten was poison. Gluten was out!

I was well and truly confirmed as gluten-intolerant when, around two years or so later, I first visited my current GP, Ben.

When I told him my medical history, he immediately turned up his nose at the thought of my diagnosis by an 'unqualified' practitioner, and recommended that I do a blood test to confirm that advice.

The only catch was, that in order to do the blood test, I had to go back onto gluten for a period of 3 or 4 weeks.

After all I had gone through in training myself to not eat that stuff, I couldn't stand to backtrack, so I politely but firmly ignored his suggestions. Again. And again. And again. And then, he hit me with the killer argument!

At my last appointment with Ben, I was talking about my planned trip to Europe next year. One of my concerns about travel had been around how I would find gluten-free foods in non-English speaking countries; I had heard anecdotally that it was not so easy to find, in parts of the continent. He suggested that maybe I had 'recovered' from my gluten intolerance after my lengthy gluten-abstinence, and that it would be worthwhile doing the test to find out 'for sure'.

With the thought of travel in mind, and hope of an allergy-free future in my heart (and stomach), I agreed to prepare for the test.

After all, how bad could it be?

the month of eating dangerously

So more than three-and-a-half years since I was diagnosed by the best naturopath in the world as being gluten-intolerant, forty-five months after I made the supreme effort to banish gluten-ous foods from my diet, and forty-four months since I thought "Hey - this guy really did know what he as talking about!", my non-believer GP finally hit me with the killer argument : "Never mind if you were diagnosed by an unqualified faith healer, what if you've improved since then and no longer need to avoid gluten? What if you can eat all that good stuff again, and don't need to stick to this unnecessary diet?"

There was only one way to find out.

But it would involve eating that 'g' stuff again!

"I'm Superman!"

the liberty valance eureka moment

After years and years and years of listening to "The man who shot Liberty Valance" and not having a clue as to what Gene Pitney was singing, today, I had a sudden moment of clarity!

"Everyone heard two shots ring out,
One shot made Liberty fall"

It's so obvious. It's so clear (when you know). Why could I never get it before? wow.

trust no politician

Was I the only one shocked and appalled by this statement in today's Age?

"Victoria Police last night said it was routine for police to sign such deals [to share information about protesters] with organisations building big public projects where there were potential security risks."

WTF??? When did private companies get the right to access Police information about law-abiding citizens?? Or about any citizens, for that matter? When did the government make that decision? What information do which companies have about which citizens? If I say that I oppose the useless and over-priced desalination plant, and that I believe it will force us all to pay mega-millions of dollars unnecessarily to an overseas private company for something we don't need in the the first place, will my details end up on Aquasure's database?

This is the worst example of abuse of government power I have heard of in the entire tenure of the current State government.

Make no mistake about it: no-one can trust John Brumby (or Ted Baillieu).