moronic - but in the nicest possible way!

Saw my favourite show of the Comedy Festival (so far) tonight - "Felicity Ward reads from the book of moron".

Felicity now has the distinction of being the first solo performer that I've paid to see in two successive festivals. She's very witty, and has great comedic presence, and her show tonight did not disappoint. Clearly, a lot of thought had gone into both the preparation and the presentation of her material. The segment about her struggles with IBS was hilarious, as was her Nando's audience meter!

And speaking of audience - the room tonight appeared to be around 3/4 full, the best I've seen so far this year.

To top it all off, she graciously stood by the exit and gave out copies of a booklet based on her show at the end of the performance, giving the audience an opportunity to get up close and have a quick word... and pretty much guaranteeing that I'll be back to see her again at next year's Festival.

a full Monty

So it's the first Tightarse Tuesday of this year's Comedy Festival, and I had to work a bit late anyway... I was heading down Little Collins St to catch a tram home, when the chalkboard outside the Victoria Hotel caught my eye. In all my life, I had never before been inside the Victoria, so, noting that there were a couple of performances starting there in only half an hour, I decided to stop, buy a ticket, and check out the grand old hotel at the same time.

The first thing I discovered was - watch out for those sliding glass doors! They just don't go where you expect them. Each time I entered or left the building, I found myself standing in front of a pane of glass while the door slid across to one side of me!

By the time I climbed the elegant, if a little shabby, staircase at the rear of the lobby, towards the ticket office, I had decided that I would get a ticket for "The Full Monty", featuring Monty Franklin from nearby St Kilda - almost a neighbour, really.

For the second time in a row, I was the first customer in the room, and as I took a seat, I could sense maybe around 9 or 10 other people around me. Not again!

Starting time came and went, and a few minutes later, a small 'crowd' of latecomers entered, enough to half-fill the room! This actually made it, on a percentage basis, the biggest crowd of the three shows that I've attended so far! After they had been seated, the show began.

I knew nothing of Monty before the performance, but a lot more after it.

He has appeared on tv in commercials and in bit parts in several shows, including the unsuccessful pilot of a comedy show, of which he screened several excerpts (which were amusing, but enough to explain why the show hadn't been picked up by the network!) He performed an entertaining and generally inoffensive stand-up routine, prompting a few big laughs from me and the rest of the audience, and leaving me happy to have caught his act.

The Victoria itself was sensational - according to clippings posted in the foyer, it was built in the mid-1930s - and it shows a touch of art deco about its interior, but it clearly hasn't had any serious structural upgrades in the intervening years. Entering the lobby felt like walking into a 1930s movie (except for those sliding doors!) I'll be looking for another show back there again soon!

go 'Pieeeeees!

Welcome back to the footy, and huge congrats to Collingwood on their massive start-of-the-season win over the Bulldogs today.

Prior to the game, I really didn't think they could do it; the Bulldogs are so highly fancied this year that I was anticipating an embarrassing start to the season, and I tipped the 'Pies with absolutely no confidence whatsoever.

Is it too early yet to start getting my hopes up for September??

mark webber who?

I don't know anything about Mark Webber, but I do know how much I love it when expatriates come back for a visit and decide to tell us all about how much worse the country is since they left!

When exactly did you become the expert on social issues in Australia, Mark? While you were o/s? Perhaps you can just head back overseas and continue to make whatever valuable contribution you make to... what is it you do exactly? World peace? Eradication of poverty? Saving the world from climate change?? And leave us to wallow in our own mistakes, without the benefit of your enormous intellect. Thanks, again, Mark.

coffee and a nice chat

I dragged myself towards work as usual this morning, feeling particularly weary and heavy-headed, and, when I got off the tram at Collins St, I walked back to Brunetti's and decided to order a drink-in coffee for a change (instead of a take-away).

When it became apparent that the morning newspapers hadn't arrived yet, I settled down in a seat and got out one of my Paris travel guide books, to continue my research for my forthcoming holiday.

As I finished the first page, an unfamiliar voice at the next table asked "When are you going?"

I looked up at the guy and told him that I was heading off in about two months' time, whereupon he offered me some tips on places to visit in Paris, and we struck up a conversation on the subject, as he had lived there for some time, and was keen to go back again. We didn't chat for long... maybe less than ten minutes... but I enjoyed our discussion and was very grateful to him for having taken the time to enquire and offer me some advice for the trip.

It brightened my morning considerably, cleared the cobwebs, and got my day off to a good start, so ... merci beaucoup!

where the bloody hell...?

OK, I said I was inspired by last night's Comedy Festival performance by Peter Helliar, so after work today, I dropped by HalfTix and found a short (45-minute) performance by an artist that I'd never heard of, at the Town Hall, starting at 6pm, so I still had time to rush home afterwards and get the groceries that I hadn't managed to find time for last night!

The show was mysteriously titled Her Lady Bones, by British comedian Sadie Hasler. I didn't know what that title meant before the show, and I still don't know now.

Sadie's show consisted of a series of character sketches, featuring several of (I assume) her own creations, plus a wonderful Katherine Hepburn impression, that had the audience in stitches. For a newcomer, she was very good.

She also impressed me greatly by the fact that she proceeded with her show at all, despite the fact that there were only six of us in the audience!

I couldn't believe how poorly attended Peter Heliar's show was last night, but this was unbelievable. I was the first one in the room, and, based on experience in previous years, I took a seat at the very far end of the row so as to make it easier for everyone else to get in afterwards. It soon became apparent that there wasn't going to be an 'everyone else', and I moved to the middle of the row when I realised that I had it all to myself!

I would not have blamed Sadie for saving her energy and calling off the show, with so few spectators, and I thought that she was very brave to proceed, given that no matter how much she made us laugh, the sound of six people's laughter and applause in even a small theatre is not a lot of encouragement.

Anyway, she put on a good show, especially her Kate Hepburn, and I hope she gets better audiences for the rest of her season. I, for one, look forward to seeing her back at future Comedy Festivals.

to Helliar and back

... As if there wasn't enough going on in Melbourne this week (the French Film Festival, the Flower & Garden Show, the return of real (AFL) footy tonight (Go 'Piesss!) and the Grand Prix (boo, hiss), the Melbourne International Comedy Festival commenced, a week ahead of its traditional starting date of April Fool's Day.

I wasn't really fussed about going out again tonight, but there is an imperative with the Comedy Festival - most shows run cheaper, 'preview' sessions in the first few days, so I always try to catch something early on.

So after work, I wandered down to the box office at the Regent, and booked a ticket to see Peter Helliar's show at the Forum. I like Helliar, but I've never bothered to see him 'live' before... probably because he's been on tv so much that I didn't consider him as much of a priority as many of the other comedians who aren't so ubiquitous on the tube.

I was glad I went. I enjoyed his performance, and got some good laughs from most of his material, but I was surprised at how small the audience was! I'd estimate the theatre was barely one-third full; very surprising for such a big name performer. Traffic delays held many people up (one couple arrived about 15 minutes before the show ended!), but even so, it was a very small audience. Good for me though... I was only six rows from the front, on an aisle; the seats in front of me in the three rows ahead were empty, as were the next 4 seats next to me, so I was able to make myself quite comfortable - a huge change from the generally cramped conditions at this Festival.

One other thing surprised me - the show was called 'Peter Helliar's Dreamboat Tour' - and he dressed in a Love Boat-style Captain's jacket - but there was no reference at all to boats or cruises or anything related to that theme. Maybe I missed something! Anyway, it was a good performance, and highly recommended.

And now I'm enthused enough to want to see another show tomorrow night...!

fabulous flower fiesta flourishes

Wednesday was day one for this year's Melbourne International Flower & Garden Show, and the only day that I was going to be able to squeeze in time to visit. As always, it was sensational - makes me wish that I still owned a garden, so that I could get out, raze it to the ground, and rebuild it with the inspiration that the Garden Show provides.

The floral displays inside the magnificent Exhibition Buildings were all stunning; I spent most of my time covering every square metre of the two floors, which feature more things to do with flowers and greenery than I ever dreamed possible (or would even want to try, in many cases!) Highlights for me were the rose displays, table setting designs, the new nursery section, and the... ummm... floral bordello! Outdoors, the garden designs were fantastic; only the garden art section was a bit of a letdown compared to last year, but that's a tiny complaint compared to all the wonderful sights at this Show.

The visit to the Flower Show almost marks a year of blogging for me... I seem to recall that my very first post here was about my visit to the 2009 Flower Show... although it was in early April last year. How time flies.

fabulous french film festival finale

Dunno why, but the French Film Festival was extended by 3 days this year, so I got to see another movie at the Kino on Tuesday night - LoL (That's the name of the film, not a comment!) The story wasn't what I expected, but I enjoyed it very much all the same, especially the beautiful Sophie Marceau! This one gets 3&1/2 stars from me; a fine way to wrap a very enjoyable Festival (and I sure hope I get to see how Fashion Victim ends some day!!)

pourquoi PAS de sous-titres??

I was so impressed by the movie Micmacs at the French Film Festival that I decided to buy a copy on blu ray to see again.

As usual, Amazon.fr was *exceptionally* efficient, and I received my disk barely 8 days after ordering. But to my horror, it's yet another wonderful French movie transferred to disk with NO ENGLISH SUB-TITLES! aaaarrgghhhhh!!!

What's wrong with French dvd companies?? Don't virtually ALL English language movies come out with French sub-titles? Why don't the French think that English-speakers aren't interested in their movies? There are so many excellent French films that I'd like to see, but the majority of them aren't released with English sub-titles, so it's not worthwhile ordering them. I'm doing my best to master a bit if French, but I don't think I'll get good enough to watch a movie without textual help.